Choosing your Bridesmaids

Your B-Maids

The bridesmaids are the bride's support network. They assist the maid of honor in completing all the tasks needed for a flawless, memorable wedding day. However, like choosing your maid of honor choosing your bridesmaids is often a complicated decision. For those lucky enough the decision is simple. For those who need more help these tips may ease the decision.

  1. Consider the number of guests: the traditional rule is one bridesmaid for every fifty guests. However, you are by no means bound by that rule. Your wedding party can be as small or large as you like. Keep in mind that larger weddings tend to be more formal in nature and therefore require more bridesmaids. On the other hand, a smaller bridal party is better suited to smaller, more intimate weddings.
  2. Consider the personalities of the bridesmaids: select a group that will cooperate more often than not. Yes, complications and conflicts will arise, especially if you have a larger wedding party. However, your bridesmaids should be able to resolve their differences in a constructive, mature manner (without needing you to intervene).
  • You don't have to include family: if you're close to your sister, cousin or future sister-in-law then including her in your wedding party would seem an obvious choice. However, you don't "have to" include relatives. While including them may avoid conflict or hurt feelings, in cases where you have many female relatives, it may be easier to forgo them all instead of having to choose. In any event, your family should be understanding and supportive of your decision.
  • Reciprocation not required: just because you were a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding five years ago, doesn't mean you have to include her in yours. Select bridesmaids that are important in your life now, not five years ago.
  • Money issues: there are many costs a bridesmaid is required to pick up, some of which are quite expensive: the dress, shoes, accessories, gifts (engagement party, bridal shower, wedding) the bachelorette party, hair/makeup and possible travel. When selecting your bridesmaids consider their current financial state. Can they afford to be in your wedding? If not, are you willing to take on some of the cost if it means having your best friend in the wedding party? Money is a personal, sensitive topicbroach it carefully and tactfully.
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